When Autumn Leaves Fall

Fall is my favorite season. I love the cripsness in the air. The crunching of leaves. The sweaters and jeans. The beautiful mountains colored in changing leaves. The holidays--also my favorite. The start of football season. And of course conference. Always uplifting, always needed.

This year I was lucky enough to get tickets to the General Relief Society Meeting the last Saturday in September. Two of my sisters and my grandmother went with me. We missed Heather and Mom. Heather obviously lives away and Mom was out of town. Would have been perfect if you had been there.
It was an evening I will always remember. One spent with some of my favorite people. Laughing, crying, growing and connecting. Thanks Grandma, Holly and Heidi for a great night.

Conference Ideas

There was a great article in the Ensign this month about preparing your family for Conference. Jake shared some of these great ideas with us the week for FHE. We tried to implement them and I have to say that after one day of conference sessions behind us I was pleasantly surprised at how well they worked. I have always thought that my children were too young to participate in conference. But I was wrong, and as the article suggested it is never too early to teach your children the importance of conference. So I thought it important to share.
1. Begin the week before to express excitement and gratitude for the opportunity to listen to conference.
2. Explain to your children what will happen.
3. Plan fun treats/food to have during conference. Have a picnic in the family room. We let Luke go to the store with Dad this morning before conference and help pick out our picnic foods.
4. Play games.
* Our primary provided us with bingo cards with pictures of gospel topics on them. Luke really enjoyed listening for the words and waiting for a bingo.
*Other games suggested were to let your children cut up the previous conference Ensign and find then match the pictures to the prophets speaking.
5. Between sessions do something active, especially with little ones. We had a wrestling match.
6. Follow up conference by expressing your testimony to your children and bringing up a few specific points your family can remember.

We were discussing with some friends about how challenging it can be to try to listen and be spiritually fed while your toddlers are tugging on you and squealing as they play etc. I really felt like we were blessed to be spiritually fed, but also able to make conference a family activity. Not just a time to try to keep the kids quiet so we could listen. Because of our preparation Luke said this morning, "Let's watch conference!!" I was so happy to see that he was excited. He was learning the prophets names and he loved listening for the words on his bingo card. Sometimes he caught words I didn't.
I have always loved conference. But today was really great. I am grateful for a living prophet. I am also grateful for a worthy priesthood holder who advised our family and enriched our experience.

Feeling Uplifted

I thought that General Conference this weekend was really fabulous. As I anticipated it, I confess I was really missing President Hinckley. I have not listened to a session of conference EVER where he was not the prophet. I know that sounds bad, but as a young child growing up not in Utah I had never attended or listened to a session of conference until we moved to Utah shortly after his call to be prophet. As I watched this weekend I felt refreshed and renewed by President Monson, and as so many said, saw the mantel of the calling fall on his shoulders. I was truly touched by his testimony and determination to give ALL that he has to our Heavenly Father's work. I gained for certain a clearer witness of his call and feel truly blessed by it. "We Thank Thee Oh God, For A Prophet!" We taught Luke to say his name, but it sounds mostly like "present monster". He struggles a little with the pronunciation.

I also felt inspired by Elder Bednar's talk on personal prayer. I found that I fit the mold he was warning against. How often my prayers have been sincere, but without further action. I resolve to do better, to be better. Of course, Elder Ballard's talk spoke to me, but so did several others, about be a mother and enjoying the journey. Like he said, to focus more on the doing rather than the getting it done. I fall in that trap all the time, checking off my lists and trying to be "so productive". I am not saying that is bad, but I need to be reminded to slow down a little and soak in these moments with my children. I really felt like this conference focused on personal conviction and conversion. We all need to get there, to allow our testimonies to fill us and guide us each day. I am grateful for what General Conference brings. And as a side note, I am grateful for modern technology that allows me to view it in the comfort of my own home, so far away from Salt Lake.

Inspiration

Sunday night was our Young Women's New Beginnings. As a presidency we prayed and planned for this for quite a while. I was given the assignment to attain a speaker. I asked this awesome lady in our ward. Their family recently moved here and in the short time that I have gotten to know her I have been blessed by her example. I don't know exactly how to describe her other than inspiring. Within a few moments of her talk I was truly touched by the spirit. I felt overwhelmed that we had made the right decision in choosing her for our speaker. Our theme was "Make and Keep Sacred Covenants". My deepest desire and that of our presidency, was that she would be able to truly touch our girls hearts, especially those of less-active or part member families. We want their goal to be Temple Marriage-no matter what. As I sat and listened to her inspired words I gained insight for my own life.
She began explaining to the girls how as a young woman herself she was insecure and lacked the confidence she so obviously exhibits today. She went on to say that she was never shy, but nonetheless devoid of a strong self-esteem. I utterly identified with this description. For many reasons that are too personal to share here and probably inappropriate to express in this venue, I was an awkward adolescent with a blurry picture of my divine potential and my earthly gifts and talents. I still find myself often feeling the need to prove myself to those around me and I, more often than I care to admit, compare myself with others-and rarely measure up.
However, don't feel to bad for me I am getting there and I have come a long way. Thanks in most part to a strong, supportive and unconditionally loving husband. He is the first person I truly believe, to ever REALLY know me-all the good with all the bad. Even from the very beginning I found myself drawn to him, but in a way so different from other people. I was for the first time uninhibited. I could completely be myself around him, and to my astonishment-he actually liked ME and later loved me. He has helped me on my road to self-confidence and continues to do so. I am so blessed to have him. I think that it may have been really easy for me to end up with someone controlling and emotionally neglectful . I am so grateful to my Heavenly Father for him. As I listened to her speak about the importance of Temple Marriage I was so grateful that I married the right man in the right place.
So back to my insight. She explained that when things changed for her was during and upon her return from her mission. She said that she knew that she hadn't changed at all. She wasn't any prettier, smarter or more talented. Intrinsically her talents had remained unchanged. The KEY, the difference, was she finally gained the vision of who she was, who she really was, a daughter of the Almighty God! There is such power in that. How did she do this? By strengthening her testimony of her Heavenly Father and developing her relationship with him and more importantly with our Savior Jesus Christ. Simply the formula is elementary, meaningful scripture study and prayer..stressing of course MEANINGFUL. So I have decided to redouble my efforts to gain a new level and dimension to my relationship with my Savior and by extension my testimony. I will always remember the way that I felt that night.

Hard to Say Goodbye

I can't believe that President Hinckley is gone. I appreciate all the phone calls and messages we got to let us know out here. I have been thinking about it all night. It is so strange because I feel so sad and yet so peaceful, I don't know if that makes sense to anyone else. It feels like the world has lost some of its brightness and it will never be the same. I feel so grateful to have lived during his ministry. He gave so much to the world, the church and to me. He is for the most part the only prophet I remember. I was 12 years old when he was sustained as the president of the church. Just two weeks ago our family home evening lesson was on prophets and we taught Luke about President Hinckley and we bore our testimonies about living prophets. I feel sad that Luke will never know him like we did. When I read the statement posted by the church I was awed at the life that he lived and the good that he did and how much it was recognized by the world. We who have lived the last 13 years knowing him as our prophet are truely blessed. I can't help but hear the words to "We thank thee oh, God for a prophet" over and over again in my head. I am so grateful for my testimony of the restored gospel, and I am truely grateful for our prophet, I will miss him.