Indulge Me

I haven't posted in a while. I don't have much to report...
Have you ever felt as if there was an external force conspiring against you? Nothing big, just all sorts of little things seem to go wrong at once? Then all of those little things start to feel like the weight of the world. Don't worry we are fine. Just in a funk. I told Jake yesterday that you know just how lucky you are when the BIG things you have to complain about are a broken down furnace, kids wetting the bed/making messes, and such. Now granted that isn't all that has come at us this last week. But I know that there are many that would trade what they are currently facing with what I am.
My sister said to me once, " You know those people who when life gives them lemons they make lemonade? They just let the bumps that come with life just roll off their back. I wish I was one of those people." I know exactly what she means. I have never dealt well with things not going, "according to plan". Even day to day. I have a pretty clear map in my head every night before I go to bed at what I want or feel I need to accomplish for the following day. When it doesn't pan out I have a really hard time letting it go. That doesn't even count all of the larger schemes I have in my head of house beautification, crafting, projects etc. Jake once told me when I was complaining to him about not getting enough done that he never had any idea that I have so many things I am trying to accomplish all the time. Most of them I never voice to him. I guess it is the OCD/analness in me. Though I don't want to spend all day cleaning and ignoring my kids I still secretly wish my house was as clean as if I had. Though I would love nothing more than to play with and teach my kids all day long, I still know I can't, but find myself feeling guilty at the time I do spend away from them. I have always been one with high expectations. So for the last week NONE of my days have gone "according to plan". Trying to roll with it, smile and make lemonade. Here's to trying to learn a valuable life lesson. Thanks for listening.

5 months old

She has finally learned to roll. On January 21st I took her for her 4 month check-up. She was actually 4 months and almost three weeks. I was explaining to the doctor that all she wants to do is lay and smile at people. No interest in moving or even toys really. So he had me lay her on her tummy to check her strength and over she rolled. Three times in a row! She would not stay on her belly. Pretty funny. Each time she would smile as if she were so pleased with herself. Making me look like a crazy paranoid mother :)

This is how I found her the other morning. I was trying to get the boys dressed upstairs and it was taking far too long. I knew she was tired and hungry and I could hear her fussing a little. I came down and found this...so sad, I guess her thumb is almost as good as milk.

Again, asleep when I thought she was playing and I was distracted with the other two.

LOVING bath time!

The day we took the boys sledding we came home because she was starting to get fussy and I knew it was time to feed her again. I layed her on the couch and in the time it took me to get Ty's snow clothes off (before he tracked wet snow all through the house) she had fallen asleep. It reminds me of a "Christmas Story" where the kid can't put his hands down. Too funny.

8 Wonderful Years

For the three years I have been keeping a blog I have always made a post on our anniversary. It seems almost trite and at least repetitive to post here again, but I can't help myself.
I feel so blessed to have Jake as my husband. I think back to the beginning. It was such a whirlwind. I knew almost immediately that I was falling deeply in love with him. I was terrified at that prospect. I had been burned before by giving my heart away so willingly. Ever since that time I had kept everyone else I dated at bay. But with Jake I couldn't help it. We both have said since that it felt like there was an external force pushing us together.
As we reminisced Saturday night we laughed at the changes 8 years has brought. We are certainly different people than the 19 year old bride and newly returned missionary who entered the Salt Lake Temple eight years ago today. But I am so grateful that as we have grown up, we have grown up together. The man who waited on us at dinner on Saturday laughed that we were celebrating our 8th anniversary. As he put it, "You don't look old enough to have three kids. You look like you just graduated High School." It is funny, I still feel the same as I did back then except for one truth...I love Jake on a deeper and more real level than I ever thought possible. Our years have had ups and downs, but through it all I have been so blessed by the wisdom, kindness and love of Jake. I am so grateful for him and the life we have made together. Happy Anniversary babe! I love you now and always.
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We aren't as skinny as we used to be...(big sigh). But still cute!